temporary happiness

In life, there is an abundance of happiness. Many people think that happiness occurs on special occasions, such as birthday parties or graduation. And sure, happiness does happen! But these events only bring "temporary happiness;" a slight glimpse of happiness that doesn't stay for long. In order for true, permanent happiness to arrive, one has to search for it. One can go through their entire lives feeding off of a temporary sense of happiness and believe that it's true happiness. And I suppose there is nothing wrong with that, but personally, I cannot live in that fashion. I cannot live my years in a way that doesn't give me long term happiness. After celebrations such as get-togethers or a day of shopping, I sometimes catch myself having this dull, empty feeling. Of course I'm happy. But I know that these are all distractions to what I really need in life. To find what makes every single day of my life worth living. Sure, there will still be days that other emotions are felt, such as sadness or anger, but instead of using a temporary form of distraction to push these emotions aside, I think that "permanent happiness" will be able to make one's mind clearer in dealing with these problems. It will hopefully make me more rational, such as using positive ways to cope with mine and other's issues and shed a sense of happiness on other people who are on this journey too. It's a hard thing to achieve, and there is no blame on anyone if they aren't able to find their niche, but then again, true and eternal happiness is a feeling that needs to be sought out. It's the same concept as many things in life; If you want something, go and get it. I really hope that one day, I will find whatever it is that makes me permanently happy.

j.j.

2016: glass half full

With 2016 almost coming to an end, the majority might look back on this year with looks of grief and anger. And although there are definitely events that have happened that are unfortunate, the good things that happened should also not be forgotten. Here is my list of good things that have happened to me personally in the eventful year of 2016.

-Truly understanding the concept of friendship: Both with making new friends and becoming closer with older ones, I am really, really grateful for everyone that I consider my close friends. Through my three years of high school so far, I have had fluctuating friendships but this year, I think I have truly found the people that I am closest to. It honestly is better to have a few very close friends than a huge group of semi-close friends.

-Restarting this blog: Blogging is such a creative outlet for me and I knew that I needed to start fresh. It is a way for me to unleash my thoughts on anything that I want to talk about and helps me practice my writing. I am ever grateful for the opportunity to blog and I see myself continuing for a very long time.

-Advancing ideas on my future: Especially last year, I really started to question what I wanted to do with my life in the future. For the three years that I have attended high school, I was always set on majoring in psychology in the future. But now, I think that I want to go into communications. I am not sure what exact area, but I hope to figure that out soon. I have also narrowed down my college choices, but that is still a work in progress.

-What the greatest form of motivation is: I have tried reading motivational quotes but the only person that can actually motivate you is you. It just takes a lot of willpower to think to yourself, "I will do this thing!" But if you train yourself long enough, gradually, the motivation will come. (I'm still in the beginning stage.)

-Learning how to drive/getting my driver's license: This may seem like such a small thing, but I am very happy that I can drive. It allows me to go home without having to inconvenience my parents, and it is a valuable life lesson because it tests your patience on the road and that patience can then be transferred to everyday life.

-Realizing that not everyone likes you: I am one of those people that cares about what other people think about me. It's a bad thing, I suppose because you shouldn't have to worry about other people's opinions. I want to learn how to build a shield from that because if someone says something that is hurtful to me or about me, I think about it for the entire day. It pains me that I have left a negative impact on someone else and I try my hardest to make it up to them. But I have realized, even if someone says something bad about you, I don't have to change for them. I don't have to prove to them that I am the opposite of the bad thing they've said about me. Because I'm not. I'm me and if someone doesn't respect or like me, then it is their problem. Not mine.

2016 may be an unpopular opinion, but I would like to cherish and focus on the good parts instead of the bad. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

j.j.

change

It's really funny watching people grow up and change. Some people might have more subtle differences, while others might have more drastic ones. And not just with appearances, but with how they act, or how their relationships with various people change. I was best friends with someone for a good portion of my life. Now, I'd like to say that we are still friends, but we both have our own paths to lead. I was feeling a bit nostalgic and ended up thinking back to the times when we were, in fact, best friends, and to be honest, I think every single change that happens in someone's life occurs for a reason. We were best friends for a reason. And now we are just friends for a reason. Change happens so fast that it's not until you catch yourself looking back on old ways years later that you realize the drastic differences. Personally, I know that I have changed quite a bit. Heck, a big change for me was starting over with this blog. And another big change, even bigger than this one, was starting my blog in the first place. The person I was best friends with in the past introduced me to the world of blogging, and I will forever be grateful for that fact. They introduced me to and reinforced a lot of things that are now my hobbies and passions. Without them, without all of my changes, I would certainly not be the person I am today. Or maybe I would be the person I am today, but a slightly different version of myself. Even so, I think that change is something that should be embraced. Whether we like change or not, the truth is that such changes are inevitable.

j.j.